I’m Too Old to Chase Rabbits

My dog, Jack, is getting on in age. It has been thirteen years since we went to choose between him and his brother. It was and easy choice. Jack was full of energy and wanted to play. His brother found the nearest object, ran under the truck and began to chew on it. Yeah…exuberant it was! Now, where he still has energy, it’s a little more subtle and his hearing isn’t what it used to be.

In the last couple of weeks the rabbits, or stew meat as I lovingly call them through gritted teeth, have come out in force. I’ve had as many as four in the yard at once, and those are just the ones I can see. I wonder where all the coyotes have gone. Have they suddenly sworn off rabbit? I hear it’s rather tasty.

Now before I receive comments about how cute and cuddly rabbits are, I thought the same thing until they ate $200 worth of plants I had just planted. Needless to say I was not amused.

Now that you have some back story, here is what happened a few days ago.

Jack is sleeping on his bed when I see one of the vermin called rabbit in the yard eating grass a little to close to my flowerbed for my comfort.

Me: Jack! Rabbit!

No response.

Me, a little louder: Jack! There’s a rabbit!

Jack’s head comes up: Rabbit?

I head for the slider and he follows as I wind him up to chase the rabbit. Now there is an art to opening the slider and not having the dog slam into it as he bolts out the opening like a race horse. You have to time it right and be wicked fast. I brace myself. Jack crouches down, ready to spring forward. I slide the door open and…

He sticks his head out the door. Slightly anti-climactic. Although lately he has been thinking about running more than actually doing.

Jack stares at the rabbit who is now frozen in hopes that he won’t be seen.

Me, very exuberantly: Rabbit! (Because that one word says it all.)

Jack: Yes, that is a rabbit.

Me: Go get the rabbit!

Jack gives me a look that seems to say: You do remember the last time I chased one of those things. I had to be carried back because my joints aren’t what they used to be. Very embaressing.

The rabbit is still frozen in the lawn.

Me: Come on, Jack. Get the rabbit!

Jack looks back at the rabbit then very non-chalantly walks out the door and to the left, NOT towards the rabbit: I’m going out front.

As Jack disappears around the corner of the house, the rabbit resumes eating, and I’m left wondering what just happened.

Have a wonderful week.
Copyright 2017 Heidi Barnes

Here is a little side story that my friend Suzanne Carey wrote after she read this piece. We have a mutual friend/bane-of-my-existence called Suzi. She is a fairy that tries hard to do good things, but somehow they always manage to go…sideways. Here is Suzi and her attempt to help me with my little rabbit problem. Chasing Rabbits.

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