I know I’ve talked about dreams before, but they always have interested me. Everyone dreams. Some remember them, some don’t. My husband always said he never dreamed, yet I hear him every once in a while talking in his sleep. That is what got me thinking about dreams again. This morning he was yelling out my name. Obviously a nightmare so I reached over and touched his arm to reassure him I was there. It took a moment, but he settled down and went back to sleep.
I have had good dreams and I have had a couple of doozies that still lives with me years later. I have a few that are reoccurring, the same dream that never changes until one day it does then they stop. One of those reoccurring dreams I have always enjoyed is the one where I fly. This one has changed over the years, but I hope that it never stops.
When I was young it always seemed hard to take flight, and when I did I was very close to the ground. This kind of worked because height has never really been my friend. If I have a railing in front of me or I’m enclosed in something, say a plane, I’m fine. It’s those cliff edges with nothing but air and a loooong drop that get me. I don’t understand those who can stand on the edge of a cliff with their toes hanging over it. It’s just insane! Some call it cowardness, I call it self-preservation! LOL
Back to my dream. In my mid-years I did not have the flying dream as much. When they started back up they weren’t as often, but there was one big difference. I was much higher in the air. Instead of soaring, I was sitting in a lawn chair with a long rope that reached down to the earth tethering me to it. As always my grandparent’s Oak tree was front and center. But instead of flying low across the green grass under the tree, never traveling farther than my grandparent’s propriety, I was high above it, and it wasn’t as fun as before. Yes the view was spectacular and I was very firmly and safely in that chair, but I knew if the rope broke I would continue floating up and up. There would be no coming back down and that terrified me. I was not ready to fly away. I still had so much to do.
I spent a lot of time thinking about what this meant. Then I remembered something I had realized when I was young and had just woken from a flying dream. I seemed refreshed and thought, maybe these dreams were my soul’s way of leaving the confines of my body and just be free to soar. So what did it mean now? Why was I no longer racing around near the ground, and what was the rope for? Answer? Well I know you will probably have your own interruptions because we all have our own ideas and opinions and that is what is wonderful about having free will, but I would like to share what I think.
I no longer race around because I am no longer young and filled with the abundance of energy we have in our youth. Now I sit in my chair and enjoy the peace and beauty around me. Below me my life stretches out like a suburb, each house a different story of my life. My grandparent’s Oak tree has always been my tether, keeping me grounded in family and youth, the roots of my life. Now that I am older I’m soaring closer to the heavens, the rope the only thing keeping me from soaring away. One day that rope will not be there or it will break. Hopefully on that day I will be ready and that peaceful feeling between the terror of that rope breaking will carry me on to the next adventure.
Now I know there are those of you out there that will think this is silly nonsense, and that is your prerogative. What I do know is, there is so much out there that we don’t know or think we understand yet really have no clue. Our dreams may be a window into that unknown. I know I have had a few that have seemed very real, and have come at a time when I really needed reassurance that everything will be okay from those that are no longer with us. So who is to say I am not right?
I have other dreams, some I wrote down that I might share. One in particular is a bit… disturbing, but there is also something very interesting about it too. We will see.
A little side note. My sister and I were the 5th generation to be raised on the land my parent’s own, which was right next door to my grandparents place. The oak tree has always been there, is still there, and had two swings and many fun memories of our childhood.
Elusive as mist through the trees The more you reach The further it recedes. Memories of times gone by Happiness with sadness combined. These are what make me Who I am, Yet as time moves on The harder they are to retain. Help me remember, Don’t let me lose myself. For if I can’t remember who I am, How can I become the person That is me?
Copyright 2015 Heidi Barnes
The prompt if from Writing Outside the Lines #19. Go take a look at the other wonderful writings and maybe try out a few of the prompts. See where your muse takes you. 🙂